One long
low and 
deep cloud
or maybe 
many gathered 
then rolled 
towards mountains 
heavy gray
they ground 
slowly on
a behemoth 
laying siege 
to the 
rocky citadel 
finally overtaking 
even the 
snowy peaks 
laying waste 
to this 
sunny day 

Some things 
just aren’t 
aren’t meant 
or meant
to be 
or even 
meant to 
be had
or held 
or heard 
but things 
being things 
frequently are 
just that 
just that
very thing 
things meant 
no matter 
no matter 
at all 

I only knock
on any door 
once if there
isn’t an answer 
I will leave 
I do not 
try the back
or the windows 
I don’t wonder 
about anyone inside 
off I go
about my merry 
business content knowing 
that at least 
I had tried 
and that what 
I was attempting 
wasn’t meant for 
me to give 
to them today 
or any day 
for that matter 

Maybe one day 
I will emerge 
from this sleepiness 
ready to love 
but for now 
I find great
comfort in aloneness 
the yakity yak
of drama silent 
the trickery of 
truth and backstory 
of all those 
others and why
they never stuck
of failed expectations 
and of disappointment 
causing my retreat 
and solo hibernation 
maybe one day 
and maybe not 
just a whole 
bunch of maybes 
staving off mayhem 
roll over I
do caring not 
to venture out 
beyond my den

I knew 
didn’t know 
had I
I wouldn’t 
have been 
one of 
those who
rolled downhill 
with you 
stopping this 
endless dizziness 
for now 
I know 
the difference 
between love’s
euphoria and 
the constant 
spinning spiral 
of chaos 
hawked as
true love