My heart
is moored
in Charlotte
and cramps
like overworked
calves
stuck
in a place
thousands
and thousands
and thousands
of miles
away
no closer
than
the moon
surely
it beats
but only
by half
the other
half
beats
where he
is or
they
are
a metronome
at half
speed
longing
replaces
breath
squeezing
my chest
like a heavy
rock
tears roll
down
like opaque
avalanches
wetting
old
yellowed
photographs
of sunny
days
when we
smiled
and danced
in
moonlight
Teach me
how to spy
on you
with just
the corner
of one
eye
Teach me
how to whisper
in a way
only you
will hear
Teach me
to speak
in humid
growls
Teach me
to explore
the ridges
of your flanks
the pools
of your
clavicle
the piano
keys
of your chest
Teach me
to know
you
like I
know
the moon
and stars
Teach me
like I’m
a failing
pupil
tutor
me
It started
as an eyelash
in the eye
winking
past flickering
light
which bathed
you
in buttery
light
past you
flowers
teased
your ear
giggling
you lean
closer whispering
nothing
yet saying
so much
Holding him
in my hands
i shake him
asking him
questions
words
float
to the top
like magic
informing
me like a mystic
cradling him
in my hands
i plead
for truth
yet only
see hints.
I’ve met men
taken them
out of a cigar box
like tiny toy
soldiers
arranged
them by height
and position
I make up stories
about battles
and barracks
I manipulate
them sending
them to battle
in my honor
they fight
for me
these men
and never tire
until I place
them back
into their cigar
box waiting
for the next assault
or meeting
or date
HARLAN DIDRICKSON 