It is heartbreaking 
this being called 
to be something 
that I’ve been 
and no longer 
wish to be 
I simply want 
to live what 
is ever left 
of my life
in my peace 
for down I’ve 
put my sword
and my shield
it is true 
what Wisdom said 
about the ghosts 
of our past 
dancing upon the 
graves of dreams 
that only death 
will bring rest

Here I sit
coffee in hand 
wondering maybe if
and maybe so
but like the 
steam that rises 
from my coffee 
I know that 
what escapes never 
comes back and 
what is cooled 
rarely ever warms 

Hurry back 
same thing 
every time 
and here
I wait
day dreaming 
drumming fingers 
losing whatever 
it was 
I was
interested in 
be bed
or coffee 
or canoodling

Tic tac toe 
and tiddly winks 
so are the 
games people play 
checkers and chess 
and hopscotch too
all just glee
and selfish giddiness 
snickers and sarcasm 
seems to separate 
oh to find 
just one adult 
on the playground 
capable of connecting 
this is what 
they call dating 

Is it just 
my imagination or
do people nowadays 
not want love 
or if they 
do it comes 
with all sorts 
of conditions that 
falling in love 
is like rifling 
through a candy 
dish looking for 
that one last
little green jellybean 
ignoring the rest