I was with him 
for thirty-two years and 
I’m just now learning 
that my moving on
is much more arduous 
than I ever expected 
leaving things behind is
the easy part it’s 
the unpacking of memories 
it’s the sorting stacking 
and even the storage 
of such stuff that 
I find most daunting 
and so I go
on with this business 
every minute every hour 
every day every year 
and I will someday
run out of time 
or of these things 
and either one is 
completely fine by me 
for this is simply 
the cost of loving 
someone for a lifetime 

The subconscious always 
allows the conscious 
to go first 
whenever we forgive 
someone consciously our
subconscious hides in 
the deepest corners 
giggling and knowing 
it will haunt 
us when we 
are most vulnerable 
in our sleep 
in time even 
it when like 
a bully learns 
that its taunts 
no longer upset 
will move on 
torturing someone else