I’ve spent 
the past
year building 
a frame 
and now 
it’s time 
to paint 
the picture 

I abandoned 
the sinking 
ship of
the gay
dating apps 
divested myself 
of social 
media groups 
turning down 
the noise 
of conjured 
false realities 
and narratives 
and finally 
settled down 
into myself 
for my
own mystery 
is the 
only book 
worth reading 

I must 
settle now 
into peace 
enter the 
last door 
before death
into a
room full 
of mirrors 
and look
at my
monsters my
cupids my
angels my
demons and 
with a
nod of 
recognition they 
disappear one
by one 
until so
do I 

I write
to write 
to sing
not hum 
to feel 
never deny
to breathe 
and sigh
and long
for in
words do
I find 
life itself 

I dog
you child 
I wait
you come 
and we
both excited 
about seeing 
until one 
day no
longer front
but back 
and then 
later and 
later and 
then none 
what’s dog
without child
but dog