Shy

I’ve always done things 
for others other things 
other places other people 
as though I was 
a marionette attached to 
someone else’s dreamy ideas
I found great joy 
in giving that to 
them but as they 
grew I became smaller 
as though I gave 
others the sun while 
I took the shade
And as they grew
I sat there waiting 
But like greyhounds first 
out the gate they 
soon lost their place 
and I having waited 
watched and observed them 
I understood their mistakes 
and when my turn 
didn’t make them myself